Beyond Tea and Small Talk

This morning I was browsing through more underlined readings from Radical Hospitality: Benedict's Way of Love, I came across this description of hospitality: "...not the same kind you will learn about from Martha Stewart.  Benedictine hospitality is not about sipping tea and making bland talk with people who live next door or work with you.  Hospitality is a lively, courageous and convivial way of living that challenges our compulsion either to turn away or turn inward and disconnect ourselves from others."  This description reminds me of Jesus boldness in eating at Matthew's house, knowing full well he would be accused by the religious leaders for dining with sinners and tax collectors.  It connects me to Jesus inviting himself over Zacchaeus' home, regardless of how people would judge him, and they did.  Tea and small talk, while well meaning and often quite enjoyable, are safe and manageable.  Inviting someone over to our home keeps me in control and in the driver seat.  Stepping into someone else's world, turning towards someone when we'd rather turn away, opening our hearts and not just our homes is true hospitality.  A few pages over in Radical Hospitality I realized I had underlined this:  "Benedictine spirituality insists that if you want to be whole, you have to let the other in.  The missing virtue of our era has been turned into a social grace that neither disturbs or transforms."